The Honours Thesis

For those of you that aren’t aware, in the last 12 months or so I’ve been (almost endlessly) been writing my Honours thesis. I finally submitted it just before Christmas (three days before, to be exact) and received my results yesterday. Since I started Honours, the aim was to receive a H1 – a First Class Honours – and as I found out yesterday, I did!

As you may be able to tell, I’m rather excited about all this. But as I promised a few of you over the last year, I’m making it available for you to download via this blog. So, just briefly, this is what my thesis is about:

“This thesis investigates the occurrence and repetition of stereotypes in Australian television commercials. It concentrates primarily on the concept of advertisements repeating a collection of stereotypes, which in turn creates a variety of gender discourses. 

In addition to the thematic analysis and critique of advertisements that takes place within this thesis, the concerns surrounding the current advertising regulatory body, the Advertising Standards Bureau, are also addressed.”

Download Now

It’s all very wordy, so let me break it down for you: if you hate Lynx advertisements, and if the women in the Napisan commercials piss you off, then you should probably read this. I’ve covered a variety of ads – chief amongst them are Napisan, Nutri-Grain, Lynx, Brut, Bonds underwear, Kotex and Hahn beer.

The Thesis: A guide to reading it

If you’re reading this for the good parts: I suggest skimming the Introduction, paying attention to the parts about discourse, and then going ahead and reading whatever chapters interest you (there’s only 3!), along with the recommendations in the Conclusion

If you’re super keen: Read the whole thing, from start to finish. Go on.

If you had to read only little bits and pieces: I’d recommend the Napisan section (Chapter One), the Lynx and Brut deodorant sections (Chapter Three), and the Kotex Section (Chapter Two). Also, anything in the conclusion.

If you have questions: Ask me! You can contact me via email: youaredoingthatwrong@gmail.com

Now, to skip all the other crap, here’s the link to download the thesis:

Download Now

The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo movie posters – are you serious?

This series is one of my very favourite book trilogies. A bit predictable, given my views on men and women, but nonetheless I adored the original books – from the Swedish setting, to the character of Lisbeth Salander, right down to book’s themes of highlighting how “men hate women” (in case you’re wondering, that’s the title of the original book in Swedish).

In saying that, I have so many problems with how the current American version of the film was marketed to the English-speaking public. That’s what I’m tackling this issue, rugby-style, today – it’s been niggling at me ever since I saw the film a few nights ago.

The Film Posters:

Firstly, a comparison. Here are two of the Swedish versions:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And here are two of the American/international versions:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The differences are blatantly obvious. Particularly so in how they play on the dynamics between Lisbeth and Mikael. Firstly, looking at how Lisbeth and Mikael are positioned in the second Swedish poster – she’s in the foreground, gazing directly into the camera, and looks a lot more confronting than Mikael, who’s just chilling out on a chair in the background. She’s crouched, alert, and dare I say, ready to pounce. In the first Swedish poster, she’s staring straight out into the camera, with just a hint of aggression on her face. Not even a hint of sexuality.

If you jump straight from these posters to the first poster in the American/International series, you’d almost be forgiven for thinking it was a completely different storyline. But nope, that’s the very same Lisbeth Salander- albeit, one with less clothes.

I’m not sure if the people marketing the American version got the memo about Lisbeth Salander not liking to be touched, and the very graphic rape scenes in the book – but I’m going to take an educated guess that they either don’t know, or don’t care. Because why else would they have put her in a poster, naked, in a very submissive, ‘protected’ pose?

Rooney Mara said this about the poster:

“There’s a certain way people are used to seeing nude women, and that’s in a submissive, coy pose, not looking at the camera. And in this poster, I’m looking dead into the camera with no expression on my face. I think it freaks a lot of people out.”

You know what wouldn’t be a submissive, coy pose? One in which she’s not some weird cross between a stranglehold and a protective arm placed across her by Daniel Craig. One in which she actually looks something besides passive, or at the very least, neutral. Give me the Lisbeth Salander holding a golf club, or a gun, or riding a motor cycle any day.  Because I’m sure as hell not identifying with the one with ‘no expression’ on her face. The only thing that freaks me out here is how she magically lost her clothes.

And for all the people out there that argue that Rooney isn’t sexualised in this pose, let me ask you a question: why doesn’t Daniel Craig also have his clothes off?

Because he’s an older man (albeit, an attractive one). He isn’t a young, sexy woman with her nipple pierced.

I’ll probably carry this into another post, because there’s quite a bit I’d like to say about the entire series (books, and films), and I won’t be able to do it justice all in one hit.

Running, and why I’m still trying to do it

Running. Don’t most people hate it? The gasping for air, the burning legs, and the overall feeling of inadequacy and unfitness that you get when you try to, well, use your legs at a pace even slightly faster than walking.

I despise running. Cannot stand it. Apart from trailing behind those smug runners in all their lycra, I also hate not being able to breathe, having sweat drip into my eyes, and the achey feeling my legs get after a few minutes. And yet I’ve been consistently trying to run further and further over the past six months.

Obviously, the question here is, “why?”. But to answer it, I have to explain a few things.

For the past two years, I’ve competed in something called the ‘Tough Bloke Challenge‘. It’s held in Melbourne and Sydney, and consists of a 5 kilometre, army style race, complete with a mud pit and various obstacles designed to test your strength and endurance. At the end, you’re covered in mud, sweat, and possibly tears. Last year, I looked like this:

Pretty sexy, hey? I can assure you, the mud tasted delicious.

Anyway, after doing Tough Bloke for two years, a friend of mine got in touch with me in July, and asked if I’d like to do something called ‘Tough Mudder’. Now, knowing this friend, ‘Tough Mudder’ wasn’t exactly going to be something as simply as a mud wrestling contest.

But before I go into any further discussions surrounding Tough Mudder, I also need to mention one of the other reasons I was actually running at all. My boyfriend (god bless him) went on a month-long overseas study trip in July, and came back feeling decidedly worse for wear, and a little unfit. Being somewhat ignorant of my previous adventures into Tough Bloke, he expressed a desire to “get fit” whilst I was in hearing range. Before he knew it, I was forcing him to run laps of the local footy oval with me. He appreciated my enthusiasm and encouragement, but I’m also sure he wanted to stab me in my sleep a few times. The first time we ran a kilometres, I swear he nearly coughed up a lung (he’s an ex-smoker).

Back to Tough Mudder. I checked out the event website, and nearly died. It was a course that was between 15-20 kilometres long, and consisted of some of the following obstacles:

• Jumping from 5 metres into icy cold water
• Swimming through underwater tunnels
• Running straight up a hill whilst carrying a log
• Crawling through the classic mud pit under barbed wire
• Running through blazing, kerosene-soaked straw. Yes, running through fire.
• Running through a field of live wires, where you are more than likely to be electrocuted

For the complete Melbourne course description, see here and click on the map.

So after a lot of convincing, I finally managed to get the boyfriend to agree to participate with me. It was after I’d already paid the $150 sign up fee that it occurred to me that I should perhaps be doing this for someone besides me. Because, to sound totally selfish, if I was doing it just for me, I would be more likely to fail. But if I took the time to do this for someone else, I’d be more inclined to actually get out there and train properly for this damn event.

And if you’re still with me, that’s why I’m asking you for your money (in the nicest possible way!). I’m not asking for me though, as I won’t get any of it. I’m asking on behalf of what I consider the most worthy and applicable charity for this event – Spinal Cord Injuries Australia.

And this goes back to the pain of running that I mentioned earlier. But the fact is that on April 1, I am simply able to get up in the morning and proceed to run 15 kilometres is something that a person with a spinal cord injury can’t do. And although I’m probably going to struggle for that entire 15 ks, the fact is that I am lucky enough to be able to walk, run, skip, hop, jump and dance whenever I like – which is something a person with a SCI can’t do.

I still hate running, but, hey, at least I can do it.

So please, any money that you feel you could donate would be wonderful  (and I honestly mean any – 50 cents is just fine by me!). I’m not expecting to raise too much, but I would really appreciate your help. In return, I promise regular updates on how badly I am struggling to train for this damn event, complete with photos of me covered in mud and sweat (and probably blood and tears, too!)

You can donate by visiting my Every Day hero page here, or you can simply walk up to me in the street and throw some money at me. Alternately, you can email me at youaredoingthatwrong@gmail.com

Fashion trends of 2012 – a guide for the uninitiated

In order to thoroughly research current ‘fashion’ for this blog post, I stupidly typed into Google ‘Fashion trends for 2012′. And fuck me if approximately “262,000,000″ results didn’t immediately pop up. It appears that everyone on the entire planet has decided to get together and write about what they’ll be wearing for the next year.

Just to be upfront, I have no fashion sense (I hesitate to even call it a ‘sense’, as sense implies either something as vital as taste, touch or sight, or something along the lines of ‘common’ sense. And ‘fashion sense’ is neither of these things, people). My greatest ‘fashion moment’ came when I was three, and my Nan made me an Easter bonnet for kindergarten:

Those were the days, my friends. Those were the days.

So it was with some trepidation that I took on the challenge of commenting on 2012′s “fashion trends”. But, nonetheless, here we are. Please keep a firm hold of your respective   newsboy hats (or whatever the hell the latest trend is in head-wear these days).

Fashion Trend# 1: Colour Blocking

I’m pretty sure ‘colour blocking’ is just a fancy way of saying, ‘wearing different chunks of colour at the same time’. According to Glamour.com, it means “Bold, solid-color pieces—like a cardi and skirt, wrap dress or demure one-piece suit—make simple dressing look glam. Our style tip: Stick to three colors max to avoid the girly, Rainbow Brite look.”

Right. So wearing different colours is now somehow revolutionary? In that case, I’m set. Bitches, I was colour blocking by the time I was ten. AND I managed to do it in some primary colours, whilst posing with my basketball!

And as for dodging the Rainbow Brite look? Try telling that to the rave boys and rave girls of our generation. I think they took Rainbow Brite as personal inspiration for their entire wardrobes:

Fashion Trend# 2: Peplum skirts, shirts and dress

I actually had to Google peplum to understand what the hell Glamour.com was on about (is  it French for plum? Is it a disease whereby one turns a plummy shade of purple?). Apparently, it is some sort of garment worn by the women of ancient Greece, that’s folder across the midriff and accentuates one’s hips.

And, again, according to Glamour, you can “flirt without saying a word in this season’s peplum skirts, dresses and tops, defined by a short flared ruffle that sits at the natural waist (that’s the tiny part!). High heels and your steadiest eyeliner flick will seal the deal on your spring glam plan.”

I thought ‘flirting without saying a word’ was more like this, to be honest:

Or even like this: (By the way, to get the best visual you need to double click on that image. Trust me, it’s worth it).

But then again, that’s just me. Fashionistas are clearly more modest. You know, how they ‘tell a story through their clothes’. If my clothes told a story, it would probably something akin to ‘Silence of the Lambs’. Lots of mixing whites with colours, and wearing them for days at a time. Did I also mention I wash my ‘delicates’ with everything else? I belong in laundry hell, readers.

Fashion Trend# 3: Anoraks

Here’s how fashion ignorant I am- I had no idea what the hell an anorak is. Once I had Googled said anorak, I discovered it was some form of rain coat. And it will apparently “fit in with spring’s sporty vibe and promise to make your rainy days look chic”.

(Image courtesy of here)

A fancy rain coat is supposed to make my rainy days look chic?  Clearly, these people have not spent a winter in Melbourne. If they had, they would realise that it is next to impossible for the average person to look ‘chic’. Especially impoverished students. Personally, I spend half of winter feeling like a half-drowned cat. I start hissing whenever water falls from the sky,  I will do anything to avoid walking through puddles (I once made an ex boyfriend piggy back me around one), and I cannot abide anyone attempting to get me outside into the wet weather. My personal hate (besides being woken up at 3:00am by random men walking into my room. Yes, this has happened) is having wet feet. I carry a spare of socks with me all winter. I’m not sure if Glamour.com would call this ‘winter chic’, or simply ‘psychotic’, but either way, I shall not be purchasing a anorak to test the theory.

I’m now off to work out my ‘spring glam plan’. This will possibly involve me lying around wearing bike shorts and an oversized Resident Evil shirt whilst eating leftover Christmas chocolate balls that were on special from Coles. Glamourous? No. Realistic? Most certainly.